The first experience wasn’t completely nice but, I’m not the type that gives up easily. This time I was going to follow a different approach recommended by one of my friends. Not talking a lot, just being spontaneous and meeting face to face, fast, like you would if you had met the dude at a bar.
Tinder was buzzing again and after a short introduction, the guy that was texting me proposed to go to a bar next to a lake. It was relatively close to home, plain daylight and perfect to try this new technique. So I accepted the invitation, got ready in a few minutes (I don’t really use that much makeup or “ornaments” so the process is pretty fast) and started my short ride to the bar. When I arrived he was already waiting for me with drinks for the both of us and paper sheets at the table. As close as I approached the table I not only realized that he did not look like his pictures but that the pages were titled “36 questions to fall in love with a stranger” (you have to be kidding me).
Because I’m way too nice (or a masochist) I didn’t immediately turn around, run away and did not look back, but instead, I greeted and sat on that cement table with this already interesting (not in a good way) character.
As feared, the conversation was a disaster. For starters, he was an aggressive person in a way that you couldn’t say “no, I don’t like eggplants” if that was his favourite food. Therefore, since I’m the blunt type (sometimes too blunt) I had to deal with a lot of comments that showed how upset he was. My entire body was yelling at me words of encouragement to vanish and cancel that, clearly, awfully mistaken match. But my curiosity and desire for a story won that fight and so I stayed longer.
I thought he was receiving that rejection from my side or perhaps even feeling the same way as I was, but no. Suddenly, he got a bit nervous and grabbed the paper sheets mumbling something like “I haven’t done this before, but I thought it was a good idea to try and so I printed one copy for you and another one for me” (a lot of preparation to not having a clue of what he was doing, don’t you think?). He gave me my copy and added that it was only to get to know me and that to fall in love wasn’t necessary (not gonna happen don’t worry).
Starting with, Given the choice of anyone in the world, who would you want to have as a dinner guest? which wasn’t that bad, it quickly escalated to questions like Name three things the two of you have in common. I had, honestly, nothing in common with this person but he somehow found a lot of things. It surprised me to see how inventive he could be in a way of believing he was something he clearly wasn’t, not to mention that he even said he wasn’t before the questions started. I also noticed that every time that I was answering, he checked his phone, later I realized he was timing my answers, yeah, that kind of a freak.
My curiosity was running out quickly and my desperation for running away from there as soon as possible was filling every particle in my body. I didn’t know what to do, I had never been in a situation like that before and I wasn’t comfortable with just standing up and leaving. I needed a good excuse or to be brutally honest but this guy was already creepy enough to have that kind of conversation. The thinking was suddenly interrupted with the question Of all the people in your family, whose death would you find most disturbing? Why? What the heck, what kind of question was that! Okay, I needed to run, right now.
I grabbed my empty glass in an attempt of looking for ideas while I pretended to look at it I guess, and he took it as a sign that I wanted another drink so he stood up, said he wanted a refill and looked at me waiting for something. After a few awkward seconds of being stared at, he said with a bit of anger in his voice: “ain’t you gonna buy me a drink?” (Uh, no. Why would I?)
– I’m sorry, what?
– You know what, forget it!
– I don’t understand why you are getting upset.
– I bought you one, now it’s your turn.
– Well, I didn’t ask for one, and I don’t want a refill, so tell me how much was the drink and I’ll give you the money.
– I said forget it! -and he turned around and went to the bar.
Okay, enough, as soon as he came back I made a lame excuse to just leave. I waited for him to finish his drink out of politeness and run away as fast as I possibly could. Weird people, and him.
My Funny Little Life 