That first night truly alone was more painful than expected. Everything was seriously real now. He was gone and despite everyone agreed it was for the best, she still loved him (or at least she loved the lie she was living in). The last threads of hope she was holding on to were dead with no ashes to fire them up again. It was true… all painfully real.

She stared at the desk were some of the things he left behind laid peacefully, and that feeling of survival you get after days of drowning in tears burst out. If she was planning on being happy again she needed to stop that and the best way of doing it when she was alone in that flat was to put away all the things that reminded her of him. Time and effort were going to heal her and one day, those things would only be things but for now, they were poison.

She put music on as loud as the neighbors would allow and started hiding away the toothbrush, some clothes, the childhood teddy bear, perfumes, hair products, papers… everything that belonged to him except for the furniture of course, as awkward as it was, she needed that. As soon as it was finished she continued with cleaning every corner and ‘purifying’ every surface. Good aroma and not a single molecule of dust were also giving her the feeling of ‘starting over’. More than a few songs later she stood up in the living room contemplating ‘Theo’ and ‘Spike’ (yes, she names her plants).

-I’ll be alright. I can do this. We just weren’t meant to be… and despite you have no clue why he left you’ll get over it. You have to get over him. Come on! You owe it to yourself!

She smiled to herself, knowing that Spike and Theo (if they could talk) would have agreed. It was time to burn the bridges that lead to him and his fake love.


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